Grief... A Walk on the Beach

Have you ever been to the ocean?  Walked along the beach... You know the ocean is there, if you turn your head you can see it, you can almost always hear it, but you aren't directly affected by it until a wave washes up on shore.  Sometimes there are gentle waves that just wash across your feet. They affect you but not harshly, it's just the ocean letting you know it's still there...

But sometimes, when you least expect it, a huge wave comes crashing toward you.  Sometimes you are aware of it and can run away from it but you still know it's there and it has still affected your path... sometimes it takes you completely by surprise, maybe your guard was down, maybe you were engrossed in your thoughts, or whatever... but it sneaks up on you and Slam!  Knocks you flat on your back.  Overwhelms you.  Completely throws you off your path.

The ocean is predictable, it's always there. Waves always wash ashore.

The ocean is unpredictable, you never know how the waves will affect you, will alter your path, will cause you to refocus.  You know the waves are coming yet you can not really prepare for them.

You are you.  The beach is your life.  The ocean and it's currents, they are grief.  Living with grief is walking along the beach... knowing grief is out there, sometimes way out... sometimes knocking you down, always there.

Learning to live with grief is learning to live with the ocean.  Surround yourself with people who will watch the ocean currents for you, who will notice 'a big one is coming' and will help you prepare for it.  Or who will come and hold your hand as the waves come.

Be that lifeguard for someone in your life.  Look at them walking along the beach, watch out for the waves washing ashore.  Have a perspective they can not have.  Run to them when they are in danger.  Be there for them.  You don't have to say anything.  You don't have to have all the answers. They don't even have to say anything.  Your presence speaks for you.  Just be there.